February 25, 2002
Self-Esteem
and the Soul
“When we plant a rose in
the earth, we notice that it is small, but we do not criticize it as ‘rootless
and stemless.’ We treat it as a
seed, giving it the water and the nourishment required of a seed.
When it first shoots up out of the earth, we don’t condemn it as
immature and underdeveloped, nor do we criticize the buds for not being open
when they appear. We stand in
wonder at the process taking place and give the plant the care it needs at each
stage of its development. The rose
is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies.
Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential.
It seems to be constantly in the process of change; yet at each state, at
each moment, it is [whole] as it is.”
W. Timothy
Gallwey, The Inner Game of Tennis
This quotation appears at the beginning of a new workbook
I just purchased on self-esteem. I
have a personal interest in this subject as I periodically suffer from issues
with self-esteem as many people do. My
newfound interest in the subject comes after listening to feedback about the
tasks that I face taking Awaken The Soul to the next level through increased
executive mentoring and lecturing, creating and delivering workshops, and
editing prior messages into a book. It
seems the only real thing holding me back are bouts with a lack of self-esteem.
This may seem an unusual symptom
for someone who, for a over year now, has shown the confidence to share his
spiritual journey with the world each week.
Like anyone else, I still have issues that get in the way of my calling.
Even though I believe that God (or the Divine) is with us and in us all
the time, our human experience can get in the way of the life we are meant to
live.
As I began to look at some
reference material on this subject, I did not feel so alone.
There were many sources in a section of a favorite bookstore just devoted
to issues of self-esteem. What I
did not see were any titles that reflected a spiritual path to dealing with this
condition. Of course that got me
thinking about the relationship between the soul and self-esteem, which begs the
question, can one really improve their self-esteem without regard to the soul?
The answer on the surface is
probably yes. There are constant
examples of people who appear to have tremendous self-esteem, but we look with
skeptical eyes at their soulfulness. Many
of the rich, powerful, famous, and talented are profiled in various forms of
media and in most cases seem to have self-esteem mastered, while not appearing
overly concerned about their spiritual quest.
But if we look at the definition
of self-esteem we begin to see that self-confidence is not the determining
factor. In his book, The
Self-Esteem Workbook, Glenn Schiraldi defines self-esteem as a realistic,
appreciative opinion of oneself. Realistic
means accurate and honest. Appreciative
implies positive feelings and liking. Self-esteem
is squarely between self-defeating pride (trying to be more than human) and
self-defeating shame (believing one is less than human) (1).
Based on this definition, true self-esteem must include a connection to
the awakened soul for how else can one truly have a realistic and appreciative
opinion of one’s self.
It is a constant struggle for us to find balance between
the spirit and the mind. One can be
very in touch with their soul and yet at times be overwhelmed by the world they
live in. This can result in
shifting the balance we seek. I
think, however, that if we go into any type of self-improvement with awareness
that it must be inclusive of the soul, then improvement or change can take place
at a higher level and be sustained.
With respect, acceptance, and love,
Richard
©
Richard D. Olson and Awaken The Soul, 2002; Edited by Janice E. Olson